Controlling parents crush the soul more than anything I’ve ever experienced. No one has made me cry to sleep the way they have. No one has made me suicidal the way they have. I’ve suffocated for so long under them that even the smallest freedoms and indepent decisions bring a smile and tears to my eyes. New Years should be a time to think positively about the future and that’s why my resolution is to get a job (even though my parents don’t want me to, another manipulation tactic to keep me under their financial thumb) so that as soon as I graduate college next year I can be absolutely and completely independent. I will find a cheap apartment even if it’s not the greatest and call it my own and I will do with my time what I please and I will go places that I find magical and thrilling. I will live my life daringly. I had a countdown in highschool to the day I graduated so I’m going to start a countdown to the day I graduat e college. Wish me luck.

15 months away

43ketchup:

not being really overweight but not being thin is a weird place because you never look quite as good as your friends and you’re in that spot that everyone tells you “you’re not fat!” but doesn’t want to say you’re thin and no matter if your weight shifts you always sort of look the same to yourself and in some situations you can hide your appearance but in others its alarmingly obvious, and buying clothes is like a luck of the draw as to if you’ll look thin or huge because it feels like there isn’t an in between 

(via literature-loving-girl)

strawberryhorrorshow:

Being abused made me such a “good kid.”

I was

  • Always polite
  • Never acted without permission
  • Never spoke out of turn
  • Always did what I was told

And it’s shitty that I was considered mature and praised for those things, and all of those characteristics have translated into me being an immature, “bad adult.”

Now I

  • Have difficulty making a keeping friends
  • Can’t act without permission/am dependent on others for direction
  • Am terrible at communicating
  • Have no agency/personal compass

It’s a really difficult thing for people who were abused as children to grapple with.
What made us good children make us bad adults.

(via psych64)

When you can’t sleep and can’t study because your stomach is in knots thinking about shit and oh yeah crying too nbd 🙃 ready for this god damn exam tomorrow

"What was it that made this human love so much more desirable to me than the love of my own kind? Was it because it was exclusive and capricious? The souls offered love and acceptance to all. Did I crave a greater challenge?…Or was it simply better somehow? Because these humans hate with so much fury, was the other end of the spectrum that they could love with more heart and zeal and fire?"
- Stephanie Meyer, The Host
(via quoted-books)

wavesbabe:

girls dont want boys, girls want stephenie meyer to write the sequel to the host


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